I want to write more about justice and follow up on my last post. I really do. I've tried. It all just seems so big and heavy. And can I be honest? My brain can't do big and heavy right now. I know it's too important to just drop. So I won't. But as much as I want to will myself into wrestling with justice, I just can't today.
I found out this week that I'm anemic. That's a pregnancy first for me. It explains why even though I'm in my 2nd trimester, I'm still battling bone-crushing weariness everyday. Yawn. Dear iron supplements, please, please seep some energy back into me (and somehow make up for the sleep I lost two nights this week while bathing my toddler in the wee hours because diarrhea diapers exploded).
So while I'd like to offer an insight of my own today...I've got nothin'.
But here's a link to a must read post on Evangelical Hero Complex. Painfully real and yet so encouragingly beautiful, it made me cry.
“If there is one soul in your care, one face in your loving gaze, one hand you are holding, you are holding the world.” --Sarah Bessey
These are words I needed to hear this week. Because this week I looked around at the world changers, and I saw all that I am not. And I wanted desperately to be one of them. But perhaps what was needed was not a world changer, but a 4am diaper changer. And if I'm not careful, in pining away for the big and the glorious, I'll miss the small and the truly glorious.
- Introducing the wonder of roly polies.
- The tiniest, softest somersaults of the new life within.
- My son's new dance moves.
- My daughter's love for laying in the grass and looking at the sky.
Holding the world, indeed.
What about you, do you wrestle with Evangelical Hero Complex?