When I chose “embrace” for my One Word, I thought I knew what I was in for. I thought I knew what 2014 would be about. I wrote a list, remember? Halfway through the year there are already some ironic twists.
Remember how I said I wanted to embrace people, just as they are, no longer wastefully wishing, “…if only they would....”
Well, what do you know, the Father has flipped that one on its head. Who knew that embracing others, their limits, imperfections and all, first means reckoning with and embracing my own.
I strain against all the ways I am not enough, all the ways I should be more, how I should be beyond this struggle, how I know what I ought to do and yet I do the opposite.
Who I want to be is the carrot ever dangling before me. I trip and stumble along, ever reaching, yet never grasping.
Grace whispers, “Do you dare to stop the straining? To stop and embrace who you are now?”
Fear calls back, “But then the carrot will fade off into the horizon, and I’ll be left as just…me…the one with daily failures nipping at her heels. How will I ever grasp the love, the joy, the peace, the patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness and self-control that I so long for?
Grace is wildly risky like that.
Does a plant produce fruit by its own effort? Or does it simply embrace what life gives it in each moment, the taste of rain, the kiss of sun, the harshness of winter, while the Maker does the work of growth?
I don’t know… I feel like I’m half way through this post, this soul searching. There's no conclusion, just lots of questions. At midway through the year, I'm in the middle fog of it all.
So this is me embracing my own limits, calling this enough for now and to be continued…
How are you at embracing your limits?